Monday, March 5, 2018

I'm running out of Portland puns


You ever seen Charlie the Magical Unicorn? It's a animated story that has made a home on the web and in my heart. I introduced Adam and Sara to Charlie after we returned to our hotel room from the dark recesses of Portland.

Every adventure needs an inside joke, or so they say. Charlie was ours. Charlie kept us level. Charlie kept us amused. I renamed Adam to Charlie in my phone. They're soul mates. Blu-loo-loo-loo-loo. We quoted Charlie for the rest of the Adventure. Charlie. Charlie. We're on a bridge Charlie.

Day two dawned nicely in Portland. The weather was beautiful. Stunning. Perfect. Praise the Sun. Back in Seattle Adam had lauged at me for having brought cargo shorts. He taunted me for my optimism. In Portland, he was cursing his lack of vision.

Fuck pants!

Opened the day with a German pancake. It wasn't bad. I was expecting a different recipe than what was placed before me. I was first introduced to the German Apple Pancake in South Bend Indiana. It quickly became one of my favorite foods. It was big and fluffy and full of cinnamon apples. Fucking awesome. Apparently Portland didn't get that memo when they adopted the German pancake as their breakfast of choice.

Then it was back on the trams. Yep. Portland has trams. Trains, trams, buses. You name it, we rode it.

Lunch was Ramen. Sara is a huge Japanophile and she insisted. My only previous experience with ramen had been of the instant variety. I ordered the spicy Miso, because of course I did. I enjoyed it immensely. But I think this bowl of noodle-soup was the most expensive meal that I ate on the trip. I'm not a huge fan of soups by themselves. They don't satiate.

To work off our foodie debauch, we decided to head up to Washington Park. This time, taking a bus! Goddamn, we are wild. A bus to a park. See the International Rose Test Garden, visit the Japanese gardens. Thats some Vegas shit there son!

Back under the power of our own feet, we began to explore a rather large and semi-natural park. Among the attractions that I just listed, Washington park is also home to the Vietnam Veterans war memorial. Oh, and an archery range, which I think was the single most unexpected thing I came across on the trip. Just an open field with archery targets set up, as if this were a common enough hobby. Which it must have been since there were several people practicing at the time.

Portland has been nicknamed the City of Roses since the early 1900s. I don't want to go into the back story, but part of the pay off is that in 1917 the International Rose Test Garden was established in Washington Park. You know, late October might not be the best time to go and see a rose garden.

Leaving the park, we split up for a while, planning to reconvene for dinner. What did I do? I took the Blue Line to it's Easternmost point. Yeah baby, gotta keep those plans intact! Really, riding the trains is just a way to see the city and do some people watching, as the tens and hundreds of fellow riders come and go with their own affairs.

Good times.

We heard tell of a new pop-up pod of foodtrucks on the east side of town. So we hopped the green line once more. This time the train was quiet. No loud conversations about how many times this rider kicked that one in the head. We had had our fill earlier in the day when two hostile crazies had a yelling contest, which involved altered iterations of “Don't follow me!” and “I'm not following you!”

I turned to Sara and Adam and proclaimed “I don't really feel like walking through this neighborhood in the dark. It wasn't awful. But it wasn't welcoming. They agreed with my assessment and we then bravely ran away.

We ended up eating at Yummy Bowls. Which was yummy. But mostly because I was famished after several long days of constant hiking. So I might not have been the best judge of the quality, as it was food and I was hungry. I also finished Adam's bowl after he turned up his nose. Cause fuck I need me some calories and I am not overly picky when the tank nears empty.

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